User:Jzhang/Virtual Safari 1.5/Fake Virtual Safari
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Introduction
Pumbaa: Oooh! Our new ride is finally finished! Come on! Let's go in!
Part 1
Timon: Welcome to the Lion King Pridelands Adventure!
Pumbaa: Yeah! And you're the very first riders!
Ma: Oh, this is so exciting! Timon, I am so proud! I can't wait to see what you've made!
Uncle Max: I've got a bad feeling about this!
Timon: Oh, Thanks, Uncle Max! Always nice to have that family support, so warm, so friendly, so...
(You slam into a painted door!)
...SQUASHED!
(Camera zooms out to a crane camera)
Uncle Max (Distant): Why are you making a ride when the real thing's right there!
Timon (Distant): You know your problem, Uncle Max? You've got no vision (Spiritually)!
(Camera on the Wildebeast Car)
Uncle Max: I have a better vision if I wasn't squished into a giant, painted door!
Timon: Ok, ok! So there's a few glitches, Keep your tails on!
Pumbaa: Timon! I think you're sitting on the OFF button!
Timon: I wondered what that was!
(Doors finally open!)
Pumbaa: Ok, everyone! Here we go!
(You arrive in the jungle, Fake Timon and Pumbaa are swinging)
Pumbaa: Ooh! Pretty colors!
Ma: Oh, Timon, this is wonderful!
Uncle Max: Not bad, actually.
Timon: See, and you thought I wasn't cut out for this! Get it? Cut out? Haha!
(Switches to a camera facing Timon and Pumbaa and Ma and Uncle Max then switches back)
(A ribbon waterfall appears with Fake Simba, Timon and Pumbaa dancing on the log bridge)
Pumbaa: Ooh! Pretty!
Ma: Oh, this is really exciting!
(You arrive in a chamber with an automated Rafiki)
Mechanical Rafiki: Look beyond what you see! So what are you going to do?
Timon: Ok! Which way, folks? You get to choose. Left or right?
Pumbaa: I think we'll pick the right, uh, no, uh, the left, uh, no, I forgot.
Mechanical Rafiki: So what are you going to do?
Ma: If I choose the right, when do I get to see the left?
Timon: Just right it again and choose left, Ma!
Uncle Max: So what are we waiting for?
Timon: Hey! You out there! Help us out, ok? Pick one!
Pumbaa (Shopping personnelish): It's easy! Just use your remote control to choose the right or left arrow.
Timon: And hurry up, before something breaks...
Mechanical Rafiki: So what are you going to do?
Timon: ...again!
Mechanical Rafiki: HOHOHAHA! AAHAHAHAHAHA! So what are you going to do?
If you chose Left, This is what you get:
Timon and Pumbaa and Ma and Uncle Max: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! (SPLASH!)
(Italian Music)
Ma: Wow, this is nice!
Uncle Max: Don't exactly remember this in the movie.
(A fake Pumbaa is drowned into a well)
Timon: Icy-picky-picky!
(The fake Pumbaa spits water)
Pumbaa: Aww! BJUBJUBJUBJUBJU!
Fake Pumbaa's Mom: Pumbaa! No playing! Don't play chicken!
(A Drunk Renaissance Hyena appears in the bridge above you)
(A hyena chases a fake Timon for a plate of grubs, Meanwhile, fake pirate Timons are waiting for their ship but doesn't know that there is a hyena waiting to attack!)
Ma: Why are they chasing you for a plate of grubs?
Timon: Don't ask!
If you chose Right, you'll get this:
(Doors open to reveal fake Timon holding fake Pumbaa)
Pumbaa: Ooh!
Ma: Uh, dear, I don't remeber it quite like that!
Timon: Mother! It's a ride! It's a "Poetic Licence"! An artful re-creation!
Uncle Max: It's a Lie!
Timon: Hey! Everything lies in a delicate balance, remember?
(Static, Pumbaa falls out of Timon's hands)
Pumbaa: Aww!
Timon: AAAAA!
Uncle Max: Oh yeah! Very delicate!
(Pumbaa Passes Wind)
Ma: Oh dear! Is it supposed to make that noise?
Pumbaa: Uh, actually, that was me!
Uncle Max: PU! Get me out of here!
(The car exits)
Part 2
(Train Sounds)
Pumbaa: OOOOOOOH! WOO! WOO! WOO! WOO! WOO!
(Sounds approch)
Timon: AAAAAH!
(3 Flashlights are revealed)
Uncle Max: Ok, Enough is enough! There's no train in the original story and don't say "Poetic Licence"!
Timon: Um, "Creative Leeway?"
(Chamber of Rafiki again but with Flames!)
Mechanical Rafiki: Look beyond what you see! So what are you going to do?
Timon: Ok, Folks! Left or right! Oh, and Pumbaa, remember this time stay away from the flames! 'cause if you go off, we all go up!
Pumbaa: Ooh! Good point, Timon!
Mechanical Rafiki: So what are you going to do?
Ma: Hmm, think! Right or left?
Pumbaa: Uh, Timon? Which way is left again?
Timon: Would ya just pick!
Mechanical Rafiki: So what are you going to do?
Timon: Come on, folks out there! A little help, Please?
Mechanical Rafiki: AHHHHHAHA! AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! So what are you going to do?
If you choose Left, this is what you get:
(Doors open to a deserted room)
CRASH!
(Materials fall down, sound goes clockwise starting from R)
Timon: Uh, Pumbaa, weren't you gonna finish this part?
Pumbaa: Uh, you said you were gonna do it, remember?
Uncle Max: So, Mr. Big, shacky, directive. What do you call this?
(Cat cries between the SL and SR speakers)
Timon: Uh, uhe, Circle of life!
Ma: Maybe we should circle on back!
(Sounds stop on L, A Wildebeast car topples a little bit)
Timon: Good idea!
If you chose Right, this is what you get:
(Haunted music, Fake Dragon hyenas appear with 2 posters, one Timon's and one Pumbaa's)
Pumbaa: Oh boy!
Uncle Max: What now? "The Haunted Pridelands"?
Timon: Why not? It's cool!
(Thunder)
(Creaking)
(You fall as Deep and as Fast as the Hellevator (A PNE (http://www.pne.bc.ca/playland/ride_descriptions.htm) ride)!)
All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
CRASH!
Pumbaa: OOOOHOHOHO! OOOOHOHOHO!
Uncle Max: I have to admit! That was pretty cool!
Timon: And unexpected!
Pumbaa: I don't feel so good!
Timon and Uncle Max: OH NO! PUMBAA! NO!
(Pumbaa passes gas)
Uncle Max: Let's get out of here!
Fake Conclusion
(Hyena sounds, eyes point at you)
Ma: AAAAAAAH!
Uncle Max: Ok, Timon! I'm quite impressed, this is quite quite...
(A lightbulb blows! the main lights go on revealing that the eyes were lightbulbs!)
...quite crummy!
Pumbaa: Whoa! I've never seen it with the lights on!
Uncle Max: What's the word I'm looking for here? Uh, cheezy, uh, embarrasing. No! I got it! Pathetic!
Timon (talking into radio): (Clears throat) We're, uh, upsday in section 4B, what's the hold upe?
Radio: Hold up your rollem in the cenum, comprende?
Ma: Dear, did you do those translations yourself?
End of Fake Safari
To continue, please go to the Real Virtual Safari