Co-sleeping

Co-sleeping, also called the family bed, is a practice in which babies and young children sleep with one or both parents. It is standard practice in many parts of the world outside of North America and Europe and was widely practiced in all areas up until the 19th century as well, until the advent of giving the child his or her own room and the crib. More recently, it has been re-introduced into Western culture by practitioners of attachment parenting.

Proponents believe that it promotes bonding, lets the parents get more sleep, facilitates breastfeeding, and protects against sudden infant death syndrome. Opponents charge that it is dangerous, due to the fact the parent may smother the child, and that it promotes an unhealthy dependence of the child on the parent.

Some common advice given is that a child should never sleep with a parent who smokes, is taking drugs that impede alertness, or is extremely obese. It is also recommended that the bed should be firm, and should not be a waterbed or couch; and that heavy quilts, comforters, and pillows should not be used. Furthermore, it is recommended that a baby should never be left unattended in an adult bed.

"Sharing a bed"

Sexual activities are often performed in a bed. Couples engaging in these also often sleep in the same bed.

Non-sexual sharing of a bed may occur in families where there are not enough beds for everybody separately.

It may also occur when lodging in a hotel etc. Reasons may include being more cosy, more practical, cheaper, and not more rooms in the hotel being available. Intermediate between sharing a bed and having separate rooms is, of course, having separate beds in the same room, but this is not always available. How acceptable sharing a bed is depends on culture, mutual relationship, and personal preferences. Inhibitions are weighed against how compelling the above-mentioned reasons are. People who normally sleep nude may wear some clothing for the occasion. Sometimes an alternative is sleeping on a couch, in a sleeping bag on the floor, etc.

In cases where sexual activity would be socially inappropriate or illegal, sharing a bed may violate a norm and give rise to suspicion that there is a sexual aspect.

This depends on culture, the relationship between the people, and the situation. Factors that may cause or increase suspicion:

• in the case of sharing a bed with a child, the fact that the child is not close family
• nudity

In cases where sexual activity is illegal, such as if a child is involved, these factors may not make sharing a bed illegal, but also among authorities they may increase suspicion.

In the 2003 documentary Living with Michael Jackson, Michael Jackson defended sharing one's bed, without sexual aspects, with a friend, even if he/she is a child:

"Why can't you share your bed? The most loving thing to do is to share your bed with someone."

He said that on many occasions he has shared his bed with one or more children.

Responding to concern after the airing, Santa Barbara County District Attorney Thomas W. Sneddon Jr. stated that, under California law, if someone sleeps in the same bed with a child this is only forbidden in the case of touching the child with sexual intent [1] (http://www.countyofsb.org/da/documents/PR-Michael%20Jackson.pdf) [2] (http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/cacodes/pen/281-294.html). This is independent of whether the child is family, and independent of clothing.

To a lesser extent restrictions on sharing a bed because of the potential of sexuality may more generally apply to close proximity, or even just being together in a house, a room, or a secluded place, see e.g. proxemics under sharia.