Mr. Show with Bob and David

Mr. Show is a sketch comedy series featuring Bob Odenkirk and David Cross. It appeared on HBO from 1995 to 1998. Each episode essentially consists of a series of skits, each one transitioning into the next by way of some sort of tangential association; for example, sometimes a minor character in one skit is followed as the major character in the next. Often common storylines or themes are returned to at different times throughout a given episode. The show is highly unpredictable and often quite absurd.

Cast members on the show included Bill Odenkirk, Brett Paesel, Brian Posehn, Dino Stamatopoulos, Jay Johnston, Jerry Minor, Jill Talley, John Ennis, Karen Kilgariff, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Paul F. Tompkins, Sarah Silverman, Jack Black, and Tom Kenny.

The show also included some notable guest appearances, including Ben Stiller, Brian Doyle-Murray, Dave Foley, Janeane Garofalo, Jon Cryer, Jon Stewart, Jonathan Katz, Jeff Goldblum, Julia Sweeney, Kato Kaelin, Laura Kightlinger, Maynard James Keenan, Michael McKean, and Vince Vaughn.

Mr. Show also spawned a spinoff movie, Run Ronnie Run, that went straight-to-DVD.

Contents

Conventions

Every episode begins with an individual introducing the hosts, Bob and David. During the first and second season, Mary Lynn Rajskub did this, while in later episodes the character doing the intro would appear later in the episode. In the opening dialogue, Bob is almost always dressed in a suit, while David is dressed down.

Every episode's title is taken from a line of dialogue heard during the episode, with two exceptions. The title of the first episode in Season One, "The Cry of a Hungry Baby," does not appear anywhere in the episode, and the title of the sixth episode in Season Four, "Eat Rotten Fruit from a Shitty Tree," is a lyric from a song that only appears in instrumental form.

Certain lines are often spoken by different characters during the course of a show (e.g., "I was on the eighteenth hole!" in the "The Biggest Failure in Broadway History" and "Who let you in?" in the episode of the same name).

Characters

See: List of characters from Mr. Show

Memorable phrases

  • "Hey everybody, it's Bob and David!"
  • "Mommy, What's a Gagortion?"
  • "I SAW THE SHIT OUT OF IT!"
  • "Can I use this chair?"
  • "Now, Who wants ice cream?"
  • "Keep 'em comin' Gleep Glop.."
  • "I'll miss you... me."
  • "All these goats are retarded."
  • "Goats are the only animals with an innate sense of democracy, that’s why they're called "Nature's Presidents."
  • "Goats are stupid, mean, and hardheaded animals, that’s why they're called "Nature's Presidents."
  • "I'm Pit-Pat, and I love you."
  • "Gentlemen, I propose that this arts funding is like a milking machine and unless we shut it down, it's gonna rip our dicks right off!"
  • "Before I die, I'm gonna fuck me a fish."
  • "Hey, I don't go to where you work and slap the dick out of your mouth."
  • "The both of youze can grab one of my books, mother-father, Chinese dentist."
  • "No gay son of mine is a not gay, you better get gay or I'll make you gay!"
  • "You can't shampoo a shampooer!"
  • "Nipples on your ass..."
  • "If you wanted to talk about pet care, you should have called last week, when our show on racism was airing, but we were taping the pet care show, which is airing now."
  • "Charity is when you do something for people while other people are watching."
  • "Take a picture, it'll last longer, jag-off!"
  • "Get used to it Hitler."
  • "This generation is worse than the hippies, the flappers, and the Nazis combined. At least the hippies gave us those fat watchbands, the flappers could dance, and the Nazis had that song 8 Days A Week."
  • "What's wrong, Philouza? A few too many of Mr. Graham's crackers?"
  • "Scientists have ascertained that there may be as many as... 24 stars in the cosmos."
  • "I'm Fran and I'm a woman."
  • "'Rock & Roll Double Chunk'. It has chocolate in it, and we figure if people like rock and roll music, they'll like this, cause it says 'Rock & Roll' on it."
  • "My great great great grandfather started this company with one single rickety leaky hand-crafted slave ship, and a simple motto: 'People Selling People to People.'"
  • "I ain't afraid of no rolley coaster"
  • "Hey I got a fake asshole...y'all got fake poo?"
  • "Hello, insurance is my game. Larry is my name. Raping was another game of mine..."
  • "I have a question, and I know you all have it, too. What is up Satan’s ass?! All he wants to do is fuck us up, the dick-licker! Now the Lord said, ‘I am the light of the world.’ Now, He could as easily have said, ‘I am King Shit of Fuck Mountain. Why would you fuck with me?!’ Now, I’ll tell you what. I am the only preacher with the fuckin' balls, and you know this, you all know this, to say, "Satan I damn thee! You goddamm motherfuckin', shit-eatin', cock-suckin', son of a B!" Can I get a fuckin' A?
  • "As mayor of the altered state of Druggachusettes, I declare this pizza to be, awesome!"
  • "Yeah, my doctor says I need medical marijuana to get high."
  • "Mr. Pickle's funtime abortion clinics: we'll bring out the kid in you."
  • "Well, if you're blind, then how did you know I was a ... homosexual?"
  • "Dick lickers!"
  • "Don't mess around ... with God's America."
  • "We're spending all this money, millions of dollars, to blow up the moon, when there are so many things here on Earth to blow up ... Mount Everest, the North Pole, et cetera. We're earthlings, let's blow up Earth things!"
  • "Ooh. I gotta take a shit. Hey Todd, hand me that Hustler."
  • "Oh silly! Everybody knows only British people can fly"
  • "Any cock'll do!"
  • "Be kind, Rewind"
  • "I am a camera, a camera am I!"
  • "Tofutti break!!"
  • "Who would shit on a flag made out of shit? It would be an empty gesture."
  • "The Great Caruso wasn't nearly as great as, say, SAMMY HAGAR, the red rocker!"
  • "Do you really think court cases are decided by judges and juries making decisions based on evidence and lawyers' arguments? Oh, Danny! How could you be so naive? Danny, court cases are decided by a series of blowjobs!"
  • "I can taste colors!"
  • "Oh my scammy flammy mammy!"
  • "Hey, who wants a banana?"
  • "Hey mom, could you pass the mashed potatoes?" "That wasn't part of the deal, son."
  • "And my heart feels like a mouth full of sores. A mouth full of sores ain't no fun."
  • "Frame it, bury it, walk 10 paces dig it up in 20 years and teach the world to sing!"
  • "Don't stick your dick in these three holes"
  • "Heavens to Betsy, I've invented a praying machine!"
  • "IT'S PUMPKININNNNNNY!!!"
  • "A rap, a rap, a rappity rap"
  • "Guys, Kate and I are getting married"
  • "And that's when Lincoln said, 'Don't diss my homies'."
  • "And don't forget to break some rules. But... Don't break any rules."
  • "I'm an old gold tooth, and I'll tell you the truth. I live in the mouth of a homie."
  • "Tri-cycles would be bi-cycles. Who's ever heard of a bi-cycle?"
  • "Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend. Always in the way.
  • "All facts start as dreams in the mind of a wizard."
  • "I wish I could be everywhere people are performing art."
  • "Where ideas can hang out - and do whatever!"
  • "Can't I just make you some sperm? It's really good."
  • "Already our little one's got a scholarship to Miss Lilly's Finishing School." "What's that?" "It's a - a school where they teach ya - how to finish."
  • "There's no such thing as a talking junkie!"
  • "One...thousand dollars if you ever want to see my toe again."
  • "There's a reason for the phrase, 'as dumb as an actor.'"
  • "It was a baaaaabyyyyyyy!!!"
  • "My shoes hurt!"
  • "Please don't kill me!"
  • "To say we killed 24 Jews would be an exaggeration"
  • "Dude, show me your weenis!"
  • "We're praying for our boy. He's a wonderful son. And I'm sure a great companion. We also pray for the two young people. And, of course, the other companion."

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